It is Good Friday today… which means that Wall Street is closed, which means that I have the day off. Lucky me? It is a day off without pay… so, not super lucky but still, I plan on enjoying myself.
However, without further ado,…
It’s that time again.. time for sin!
Welcome to my mini-meme
Kay's Seven Deadly Sins Meme
(still not an artist)
(Again special thanks to those of you playing and those of you reading. If you want to find out about how to play, Read This.)
The Sin of the Week this time around is Pride.
Not a big shocker this week… had you been paying attention you probably knew that Pride was fast approaching and that it is the last of our sins.
I think they mislabeled this one. I think Pride is fine… but hubris is sinful. However, who am I to quibble?
Pride takes many forms and yes there are ways in which Pride is not at all a bad thing. as with many of these ‘sins” the general thing isn’t bad… but when it becomes too all encompassing or powerful a force in one’s life, then it becomes bad and should be avoided.
I struggle with pride. Not the arrogance hubris sort of pride… In fact I have a bit of the opposite problem stemming from a rather lower than normal self esteem and some very major body/eye/shyness issues.
But I do struggle with pride. I am often too proud to admit when I need help.
Now, you might be rolling your eyes and such, but let me explain.
I have poor eyesight. Not as bad as some people but vastly worse than most people. I wear glasses (bifocals) and I don’t drive. Nor do I see in 3D. I also have difficulty with depth perception, peripheral vision, and of course seeing things that are small or far away. Far away being a relative term meaning that no matter who you are or how well I know you, there is a VERY good chance I won’t know it is you until you are less than 10 feet away…. (Please make a note of this should we ever agree to meet up in a bar, coffee shop, beach, etc. I am not ignoring you… I just haven’t figured out that it is you who is waving at me from all the way over there…. And I have enough stories of getting in the wrong car, sitting down at the wrong table, dancing with the wrong guy, or waving at a total stranger, thus I am wary and will need more than a wave.)
It is actually very hard for me to admit all that… and this is the internet where one should be able to admit to all sorts of things because after all, you all don’t really know me right? But admitting that I have problems with certain things, that I am not as good at doing things as others, that occasionally I need a helping hand on the stairs or whatnot is very very difficult for me.
I don’t like asking for help.
And it isn’t just the visual things (although that is a glaringly obvious example.) I don’t like asking people to drive me places. I don’t like asking people to help me move. I don’t like asking people for advice even when I need it.
Because of pride. Because even though I have trouble, I like being self sufficient.
However, usually I get over myself. Not always, but mostly. I ask for help.
But I have an even harder time accepting it.
To the point where I have put myself in dangerous or stupid situations or paid extra or gone without because I didn’t want to ask for help or couldn’t accept the help that had been offered.
And that is when I know my pride has become hubris (arrogant pride) and it is at those moments that I need to remind myself that asking for and accepting help doesn’t make me a mooch or a looser.
It makes me human.
Okie dokie…. There you have it; Pride.
Feel free to write your own “Pride” piece and post it before next Friday… and make sure to come back next week for the Sin Wrap Up and Prize Drawing.
(Yes, a prize drawing… you all thought I forgot didn’t you?)